Sponge Throwing

Pretty sure there isn’t a prize for Throwing Wet Sponges At Children during the graduating year’s “fun run” at the school sports day… but just like the kids are asked to, I’m going to try my best. 😁

Typeseccing

I don’t want to withdraw any of our children from sec [sic] education lessons.

Part of an email, written in Comic Sans, reading: Ages 10 – 11 Puberty for boys and girls revisited. Understanding conception to the birth of a baby. Becoming a teenager. All lessons are taught using correct terminology, child-friendly language and diagrams. / Content on relationships is compulsory for all children as well as work on reproduction and body parts, which is also covered as part of science lessons. However, parents can decide to withdraw their child from sex education lessons. Class teachers can provide more information if you wish to discuss this with your child’s teacher. / If you would like to withdraw your child from sec education lessons, then please put this in writing by the end of this week 6th June.

However they’re spelled, they’re a great idea, and I’m grateful to live in a part of the world where their existence isn’t the target of religious politics.

But if I can withdraw consent to receiving emails about sex education in Comic Sans then that’d be great, thanks. 😅

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Map of the Titan

Y’all seemed to enjoy the “overworld” map I shared the other day, so here’s another “feelie” from my kids’ ongoing D&D campaign.

The party has just arranged for passage aboard a pioneering (and experimental) Elvish airship. Here’s a deck plan (only needs a “you are here” dot!) to help them get their bearings.

In the style of a passenger ferry, a floorplan for a dirigible, weighted down by polyhedral dice. Fantasy world quirks like bilingual text in Common and Elvish and the emergency exit sign depicting a fleeing witch complete the effect.

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Family D&D’s Overworld Map

In preparation for Family D&D Night (and with thanks to my earlier guide to splicing maps together!), I’ve finally completed an expanded “overworld” map for our game world. So far, the kids have mostly hung around on the North coast of the Central Sea, but they’re picked up a hook that may take them all the way across to the other side… and beyond?

Banana for scale.

(If your GMing for kids, you probably already know this, but “feelies” go a long way. All the maps. All the scrolls. Maybe even some props. Go all in. They love it.)

On a dining table lies a old-style map comprised of 12 sheets of A4 paper, sellotaped together. The map shows the 'Central Sea', an inlet from the 'Terminic Ocean', around which various settlements, forests, mountain ranges, and swamps can be found. An underripe banana sits in one corner of the map, weighing it down.

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Daily Brushing

8-year-old, looking like a haystack: “Why do I have to brush my hair? I did it yesterday!”

Lake District art lesson

Brought the kids up Knipe Scar with limited and challenging art materials (huge sheets of paper and thick marker pens) for a lesson in drawing what a landscape makes you feel, rather than focusing on what you can actually see.

Two children on a rocky green hillside each draw on a sheet of A1 paper.

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Note #26282

“I know that losing your job was hard,” my 8-year-old said to me this evening, “So you can borrow this.” He handed me his newest soft toy.

“It’ll help you feel better when you’re sad. Keep him for the week.”

😭

'Squishmallow' soft toy in the shape of a fat snake with a starry belly, sitting on a grey pillow.

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Unacceptable language

8-year-old, angry: Give me that fucking thing right now!

Me: [Child’s name]! That’s not an acceptable way to ask for something!

8-year-old, calmer: Sorry. PLEASE can you give me that fucking thing?

Note #26217

For a little while I got to lie in the sunshine and read my book in quiet solitude. But before long I found I was sharing it with a small child and his noisy games console.

Still delightful, though, and it feels wonderfully Spring-like out there today.

Dan, seen from his 'head' end, lies in a hammock with a green book, 'Bored Gay Werewolf' on his belly. At the other end of the hammock a boy plays on a Nintendo Switch. Around them is a garden containing a climbing frame and a washing line full of white shirts and sheets.

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