Tag: joke
-
Dan receives a second letter from the Prime Minister, and fully backs the government's bold new strategy.
-
Jokes I've Told That My Male Colleagues Didn't Like
Humour tells you where the trouble is. Don't be offended! It's only a joke! ;-)
-
Our youngest, aged 2, may have just came up with his first joke.
Yellow duck: Quack quack quack. Quack quack quack quack.
Blue duck: Shut up. I hate quacking. -
Jokes That Aged Badly
Why is Margaret Thatcher like a pound coin? Find out why, and then have the joke explained to you, here.
-
Watch out! There's a cleverly-crafted link going about this morning that, if you click it, automatically kicks you out of the MegaLounge!
-
The Worst Joke I Ever Heard
After refusing to share it for over twenty years, Dan performs his first (and only) re-telling of the worst joke he ever heard.
-
I went to an REM concert
Dan makes a bad joke based on REM lyrics, but with a morsel of truth within.
-
Best April Fools Pranks 2011
Dan points out some of his favourites among the April Fools' pranks from around the web this year.
-
Dan's April Fools' Jokes This Year
After JTA and I's monster plan for a great April Fools' joke got rained-off this year (maybe another year), I just had to go ahead with two smaller April Fools' gags this year.
The Photocopier Prank
A nice simple joke at the expense of the people in the office building I work in (and far less complex … -
My April Fools
I've always had a thing for big, overcomplicated April Fools' gags. Traditionally, we'd always play pranks on Penbryn Halls at the University, but it's not so easy these days to gain access to halls of residence, now that they've installed door locks that don't open by themselves when you so much as breathe hard on …
-
Self-Harm Awareness Day
There's a mailing list I'm on that just got a message that started as follows:
Subject: March 1st - Self-Harm Awareness Day
Just curious...
a) How many of you knew it was self-harm awareness day on March 1st and
b) Are you doing anything to mark it?
<snip>
It's pretty bad that the first response I thought of was … -
Instructions On How To Clean Your Toilet
Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to … -
Daddy, Why Did We Have To Attack Iraq
Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?
Because they had weapons of mass destruction.
But the inspectors didn't find any weapons of mass destruction.
That's because the Iraqis were hiding them.
And that's why we invaded Iraq?
Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.
But after we invaded them, we STILL didn't find any weapons of mass destruction, did we?
That's … -
Those Commie Martians
This story about the European Space Agency by the BBC reads:
...The Mars Exploration Rovers will touch down in January next year, just after the Europeans arrive with their Marx Express mission in December...
Marx Express? I suppose we should have guessed that the so-called 'red planet' was communist. -
Idea Of The Day From Alex And Dan I
Wouldn't the world be so much better a place if Brits had to go through some kind of vetting procedure - a test of sorts - before they were permitted to go on holiday to Ibiza?
An example extract from an interview might be:
Interviewer : Question twelve: if you were to be granted passage to go …