Tag: films
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Review of Total Recall (2012)
This review originally appeared on Amazon. See more reviews by Dan. Total Recall (2012) Rating: โญโญ Why are there remakes?
Sometimes I wonder why a film gets remade only to make it worse. The original Total Recall was a good film. Not a masterpiece by any stretch, but a clever, funny, action-packed (and only slightly โฆ -
Family Vlog Moments - Falcor
Unused footage from Godzilla Huntley's Family Vlog covers the debate between Godzilla and her mother about whether or not Falcor, the luck dragon from The Neverending Story, is a mammal.
The argument remains unresolved.
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Movie Title Mash-Ups
Dan and Ruth spend the greatest part of an evening playing "Movie Title Mash-Up", the second-silliest social game to come out of TV show Cougar Town.
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A Three-Sentence Review Of Looper
A three-sentence review of Looper, the second-best of the three films in which Bruce Willis travels back in time and encounters a younger version of himself.
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Three Films I'd Watch (if anybody made them)
Dan pitches three movie ideas: "Knights of the Living Dead" (a twisted form of the Arthurian legends, with zombies), "My Daughter's Hand" (a story of love, homophobia, and family), and "The Bone Wars" (a dramatisation of the real-life rivalry of two of the Victorian era's most-famous palaeontologists).
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Quiet On Set
When you watch The Quiet Ones, listen out for Dan cycling past, complaining the whole way about the film crew that have taken up camp between him and his office.
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Worst Weekend Of Cinema - Part 2
In another bad cinema experience, Dan ends up watching the truly dreadful Piranha 3DD.
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Worst Weekend Of Cinema - Part 1
Dan goes to the cinema with Ruth and JTA, and they don't watch a film. However, they do have a good old complain.
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Star Wars - Machete Order
Ruth, JTA, and Dan watch the Star Wars series in Machete Order - that is, episodes IV, V, II, III, then VI.
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The Artist
Dan and Ruth go to the cinema to see The Artist, and Dan shares his thoughts on it.
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On This Day In 1999
It's 12 years to the day since Dan first downloaded a copy of The Matrix, whose massive 1.4GB bulk ate up virtually all of his spare hard drive space. How quickly these things become obsolete.
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First Class Film
Dan watches X-Men: First Class, and spots his office in the background during a part of the film. No; not the part with the battle between the jetfighter and the levitating submarine.
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Beware: Necrophiliac Paramedics!
If Dan is killed on his way to work and his lifeless body is raped by a necrophiliac paramedic, it's JTA's fault. You read it here first.
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A Video Game Movie I'd See
Video game movies are notoriously bad, no matter how awesome the game that inspired them. Wing Commander took a classic video game series and completely ruined it. Doom was incredibly dull, even though it was based on one of the most popular game series that have ever exited. Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time โฆ
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Women in Movies
Spoiler alert: this blog post contains significant spoilers about WALL-E, and contains minor spoilers about Salt (although these shouldn't be spoilers to anybody who's ever seen an action film before).
The Bechdel Test
I've talked to some of you already about my thoughts on the Bechdel Test, which aims to illustrate the under-representation of women in contemporary โฆ









