Dan Q

LayoffBot – eliminating the human in human resources

This is a repost promoting content originally published elsewhere. See more things Dan's reposted.

Illustration of the 'LayoffBot process': 1. Schedules casual 1:1. Our next gen AI schedules the dreaded "quick chat" for Friday at 4:55 PM, ensuring a ruined weekend. 2. Conducts Layoff. Our AI delivers the news with the emotional depth of a toaster while recording reactions for management entertainment. 3. Completes Paperwork. Instantly cuts off all access, calculates the minimum legal severance, and sends a pre-written reference that says 'they worked here'.

It was a bit… gallows humour… for a friend to share this website with me, but it’s pretty funny.

And also: a robot that “schedules a chat” to eject you from your job and then “delivers the news with the emotional depth of a toaster” might still have been preferable to an after-hours email to my personal address to let me know that I’d just had my last day! Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but there’s some news that email isn’t the medium for, right?

Reposts of spicy takes on Automattic leadership and silly jokes about redundancy will cease soon and normal bloggy content will resume, I’m sure.

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