The Most Unusual Gift Idea Ever

Disappointed with the shape of your turds? Bored with “sausage-shaped” shit? Why not treat yourself to a pack of 10 Turd Twisters? Inserted carefully into the anus, they allow you to mould your faeces into amusing and interesting shapes. They’re “one-size-fits-all”, dishwasher safe, and come with their own special Safe-T-Floss Retraction Cord, just in case they get embedded too deeply into your rectal cavity.

Plus, when you order, you get a free book, “How To Twist Your Turds.”